Easter

If you are my friend on Facebook, then you saw the kids in their Easter outfits.

So much cuteness.

I didn't bother with "fancy" photos, because church ends at noon.

By that point we are all starving and starting to get grumpy.

 

So here are egg hunt pictures instead!

Yay!

Tasha and I tried to contain the children while Jared and Denny hid all 120+ eggs.
Isn't she the prettiest pregnant lady?

Finn wore his festive Easter diaper.

Once the men finished, we released the children.

They instantly scattered with their little buckets in tow.

The adults gave assistance when needed, but mostly just stood around watching.

And then there is Jared...

Their buckets were filled and everyone was happy!

All the girls had to check to see what goodies the eggs held.

So. Much. Candy.

I dragged Denny outside to make sure I was "documented" in the family memories.

I also wanted to get a picture of Denny.

Finn was not cooperative.

We had lots of fun.

I hope everyone else had a lovely Easter as well.

Scarborough Renaissance Festival

Every year we go to the Utah Ren Fest for Mother's Day.

It's just what we do.

Or did.

While I was busy being a heaping pile of depression, Denny found a festival here in Texas.

The Scarborough Renaissance Festival.

We went this past weekend to celebrate my birthday.

It is freaking HUGE!

If you have not gone, you are missing out.

 The cousins and Emilyn (adopted family) even joined us.

Enjoy a handful of pictures, taken with my new camera.

Mya did not want to share her stroller.

 

Tasha making fun of Jared.

Sophie's fancy flower face paint.

Games galore!

Mya smashing the frog catapult.

The girls went fishing for duckies.

Shooting things!

Emilyn (the adopted family).

This is the girl who is plastered all over my facebook with pictures of my kids.

We love her.

The girls filled necklaces with fairy dust.

They even rode a pirate ship.

Emilyn helped carry my camera whenever Finn was sick of the stroller.

I took the girls into the petting zoo.

Mya caught a baby chicken and snuggled the crap out of it.

It fell asleep in her lap.

Just more proof that I NEED chickens.

The adults grabbed some snacks before heading home.

Finn enjoyed some as well.

Jared stuffing his face with a turkey leg.

It was oodles of fun.

We were there ALL day and didn't even see all of it.

I can't wait to go back next year. :)

Also, thank you everyone for the birthday wishes!

I had a lovely weekend!

My Garden

Sophie has always had the sweetest personality.

She is always thinking of others.

She shares everything.

She gives without thought.

She is an amazing person.

After I had Mya, I struggled with postpartum depression.

Sophie would hug me and remind me to take my pill, so that I could be happy.

She was 3.

When Finn was born, it was even worse.

I remember one time I was laying face down on my bed.

Overwhelmed by the world, I silently begged for the ground to open and swallow me up.

My face was wet with tears.

My body was completely exhausted.

The idea of surviving another day was almost too much to stomach.

Sophie came quietly into the room, and stood there for a moment. 

When I didn't respond, she moved closer.

Covering me with the quilt, she leaned down and kissed my head.

I wanted desperately to find the will to tell her that I was ok, but I couldn't.

I just laid there.

Lifeless.

She whispered in my ear, "It's ok, Mom. I know it is hard for you sometimes."

After stroking my hair a few times, she left the room.

Her compassion is endless.

I am over the moon that I get to raise a girl with such a beautiful soul.

She will be even more incredible when she is grown.

A few weeks ago, Sophie drew this picture for me.

Her face beamed when she proudly handed it to me.

"This is for you, because I know you miss our garden."

I do.

I so desperately miss my house, my yard, my giant windows, but most of all...

my garden.

Now, thanks to Sophie, I have a beautiful garden to look at every day.

Zoloft

I like to think of myself as a strong person.

I can accomplish many things with determination and time.

 Many, but not all.

Once the idea of hurling myself off an overpass stared to look like an appealing option, I had to reevaluate.

Choosing the lesser of two evils, I've started Zoloft again.

Why is this any of your business?

It really isn't.

BUT

I believe that mental health is something that needs more attention in our society.

While not everyone is blessed (sarcasm) with a lifelong condition like my bipolar disorder, everyone struggles now and again.

Happy people can get depressed.

Such is life.

SO

I'm bipolar.

And I'm cool with that.

I'm still a fantastic mother.

I'm still a bangin' hot wife.

I'm still a crafty overachiever.

Let's be honest, crazy people are always more fun anyway.

Now enjoy some pictures of my beautiful children!

Sophie is 6!

Holy cow do I feel old.

My little girl is 6!

We no longer live in the snow-covered state, so we got to celebrate outside!

It was awesome.

We did treats and gifts at the park.

For her treat, Sophie picked oatmeal raisin cookies.

Yummmmmm.

We got her a bow and arrow set.

And a dart gun.

A little nightlight bug thing, and some silly string.

I didn't get oodles of pictures because my plans were ruined by my lack of directional awareness.

We quickly did gifts then shot off to the movies.

Sophie wanted to see Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs 2.

She has since been shooting everyone with her gifts.

I was woken up with an arrow to the face this morning.

Worth it.